14 September

Just don't bloody ask - the bint says she's been busy, I know I am now IMPRISONED in my own garden (for the time being anyways!)

It's been ages I know and I have so much catching up to do.  A week past Monday she took me over the other side of town, it meant we had to walk past the Ladhope, well she thought she was walking past, I had other ideas, I remember the first time I went in there, I got crisps!  So if she thought I was going to look a gift horse in the mouth, well I never got any crisps but I got loads of cuddles off people.  We eventually got over to her pals. she has a dog too, so we had a great time but eventually I wore her out - I guess I'm a bit too boisterous at times!

Tuesday, the dreaded vet - I'd put on ½ a kilo but the blonde bitch (aka the vet) got me with a needle, but I took it like a man.  I'm not sure about putting ½ a kilo on in two weeks though, will this mean losing my racing snake figure?  There was no repeat of the chaos on the kitchen floor on Wednesday morning which I was a tad relieved about.

The rest of the week of quite uneventful really, I popped along to the Ladhope again, the bint said she was thirsty, but I now know where they keep the dog treats so I was quite happy.

Last Sunday, the bint picked a pal up and we were in my carriage for what seemed ages, when we stopped, holy moley! - more water that I've EVER seen, we were at a place called Eyemouth - my first visit to the seaside.  So many dogs to play with, so much seaweed to be dragged along the beach, rock pools to investigate, people were swimming in the sea, the bint thought they were mad.  I walked along the edge of the water but when my feet got wet I wasn't too sure about it and the noise when the waves landed made me a little nervous I have to admit but I got over it!

I have to apologise to the family that were having a barbie on the beach, I didn't know it was etiquette to be invited!  I just sort of sauntered up, well the dopey cow should have picked her burger up shouldn't she?  It was just THERE - what's a poor puppy who is bereft of all social graces supposed to do - well I just helped myself - didn't go down too well with the bint, I think I embarrassed her (something she'll just have to get used to!)

The other evening we went for a walk after dinner, I met a little terrier called Milly, she's quite cute and we had some fun together.  It started to rain, just a little bit but then the HEAVENS OPENED - I was soaked through, was I glad to get back home, the bint has a towel sitting on the radiator by the front door, I was SUPPOSED to sit down and let her rub me down with a towel - what planet is she on?  The rug was far better, I rolled and rubbed my soaking fur all over it, when I'd finished I condescended to let the bint use her poxy bloody towel! 

I NEARLY had an awful experience yesterday.  I've been barred from the field at the back of the office, you remember the film Babe, well I ain't no pig but I can herd sheep!  The bint is worried I might hurt the sheep, chrissakes, she saw what that sheep did to me last week, HEADBUTTED me and she thinks I might hurt the sheep!!!  Anyways, she walks me down a track next to an empty field, we were going for a wee walk the other day but the farmer from up the lane was there just shutting the gate.  He told the bint that he'd just put a bull in the empty field, man that thing was angry, you should have heard the noise it was making.  Back to yesterday, the bint was taking me up the lane towards the farmhouse, all of a sudden I was SCOOPED up, the damn bull was wandering up the lane - ON ITS OWN!!!!!!!!!  I was taken back into the office and DUMPED into my bed whilst the bint was looking for a phone number to get in touch with the farmer, we then heard the quad bike coming down the lane, so we went out to have a chat with the farmer when the bloody bull turned round and started coming towards us!!!!!!!!!!  Fortunately the bint had me in her arms and we disappeared round a corner so the bull couldn't see us.  Eventually he was returned to his field and we went for our walk.  I hope I don't sound like that bull when I'm horny!

Weekend coming up - don't know what's in store for me - hopefully we can go to the beach again.

Laters!!!

BB